In March of 2003, I started getting fat. Not really fat, just a little chubby around the mid-section. I wasn't surprised since I was working at a job where they catered in from restaurants every day and my eating habits hadn't been the best. I vowed to eat only salads and do more situps. Then I realized that my chub didn't feel like mushy fat. It felt a little more solid. Like maybe a uterus. "Ha!" I thought to myself, not really amused. No way I could be pregnant. Allie was still a few months shy of her first birthday. And besides, breasfeeding is great birth control, right?
I bought a pregnancy test from the drugstore, while mentally cataloguing any possible symptoms. Was I tired? Well, yes. I had a teething infant at home and I was working full-time. Of course I was tired. Nauseous? Not really. I'd been really sick in February with the same flu as everyone else. Sore boobs? Lookup "Nursing a teething infant" and you'll know why I dismissed that one as well.
I unwrapped the test stick at home in my bathroom and that second line reddend almost before I could pee on it. I'm surprised it didn't rearrange itself to spell out "Duh, Ashley" and slap me in the face. Okay, pregnant wasn't bad. They say you get bigger faster with your second pregnancy, so I figured I would be about 6-9 weeks along. I had no missed period to calculate by since I was nursing, so I did my best guess and figured I'd be in the market for an October/November baby. Definitely doable.
When I went to the doctor for the standard first appointment, I figured we'd just photocopy all my answers from the last time I was pregnant (what, like a WEEK ago?) and that we might try and hear the heartbeat. As the doctor palpated my abdomen, she raised an eyebrow in my direction and said "Have you felt anything move?" and started squirting that warm ultrasound goo on my tummy. I stammered out that no, I think I'd know what a moving fetus felt like and that I'd just been really gassy thankyouverymuch. Then she put the ultrasound wand against my skin and I saw my baby. "Oh," was about all I could manage as Dr. L smiled and said "Nope. That's the baby moving."
I went through the entire catalogue of human emotions in approximately 5 seconds as she measured different parts of the baby to figure out how far along I was. I'll never forget watching her drag that circle on the screen to measure the head circumference. As the circle got bigger, the EDD in the corner of the screen went from November (Cool! A Thanksgiving baby!) back to October (Even better! We'll share a birthday!) and then into September (Um, okay. That's pretty soon.) before settling in at the middle of August. "You're 17 weeks and 5 days along. And it's a girl." I always wanted two girls. I just didn't know I'd be getting my wish so soon.
And as soon as mid/late August seemed, I was even more shocked when my water broke in early July. A lazy Sunday napping with Allie turned into a frantic rush to the hospital and worries that the baby would come too soon. Luckily, I wasn't having contractions, so my doctor was content to keep me in the hospital on bedrest for a few more weeks while we let the her cook a little longer. She wasn't quite done getting her lungs ready for their big debut, so we bought her a few more weeks.
I spent those weeks in the hospital surrounded by baby name books as we hadn't picked out a name. Her father didn't like anything I picked out, and I thought all of his suggestions sounded like stripper names. My names were perfectly reasonable. Cordelia, Avalon, Zoe, Amelia. He hated them all. Finally, the night before I was induced, I finally decided. "Her name will be Avery. Here are 3 middle names to choose from." And he actually picked my favorite one. Colette. It was French and meant "victory of the people" which I thought would bode well for the fight ahead of her as a preemie.
She was born 5 years ago today and hasn't stopped fighting. Her struggles as a preemie were blessedly few, and her health concerns going forward are limited to asthma and allergies. But her spirit is absolutely victorious. She is the quickest to smile. She lives to make people laugh. Her voice and mannerisms are certifiably the cutest thing in the whole state of Texas (Unless cousing Charleigh is visiting. Then it's a tie.) She is a talented artist, loves to sing and dance, would sell her soul for all the Care Bears in the world, and she loves everybody. She is absolutely the most joyful little girl I've ever met, and I'm so proud that she is mine.
Happy birthday Miss Avery. Promise to stay a kid forever, okay?
Show us the last thing you bought.
I heard "Creator" on Grey's Anatomy last season, then forgot about it. Then Nora put it on her MySpace, and I got hooked on it again. I looked up some other stuff by Santogold, and I'm liking what I hear.
Just a little warning about the second video. There is some heavily stylized and allegorical violence. I thought it was very creative, but you may not. Fair warning.
Hey peeps! It’s been almost a year since I mentioned this so I just want to quickly remind you guys that you can help contribute to charitable causes simply by clicking a web button. Doing so takes up an almost imperceptible fraction of your daily surfing time. In fact, donating to The Animal Rescue Site would take about the time it took you to read this sentence. One click. No lie. The clicks from yesterday alone provided 186,935 bowls (42.4 metric tons) of food.
Plus, everything you buy from them provides shelter animals with necessary relief. And, seriously, who wouldn’t want this incredible t-shirt? (I mean besides mailmen and people on the lam, of course.)
By the way, The Animal Rescue Site is a part of GreaterGood.org. If you like the idea of giving just by clicking, you will want to also visit the GreaterGood sites for World Hunger, Breast Cancer, Child Health, Literacy, and Protection of Rainforests.
So I got this email from the people that I bought the hair straightener from at the cosmetics trade show. It had a link to their website, which you can buy their products on. The straightener that I bought for $30 was selling for $300 on their website. With a $50 discount at the moment, so that it's final price was $250. I wish I had stocked up so that I could sell them and make a huge profit.
Time to Love and Loathe...
I'll make it short. ....
Loathe:
constipation.
aching assholes from shitting 2 days worth of shit before 6am.
pimples.
being so tired I'm craving chocolate everyday at 2pm.
anxiety.
stress from work.
being over worked.
my optimism that has gotten me nowhere.
Love:
my ass lately. I think the 2 pound weight gain went there and I aint hearing no complaints.
I get to box this week.
I'm counting down to NYC.
The sun. But it seems to have disappeared today.
Coffee in mass amounts.
The support I've been receiving about making the decision to go see a therapist.
Gimme a V! Gimme an O! Gimme an X! What's that spell? VOX!
What better way to tell the world how much you love Vox than to announce it on Facebook? That's right: Vox now has an official Facebook page! Become a fan of Vox.com on Facebook and let your friends know what you really care about: staying connected with friends and family through blog posts, photos, videos and comments.
Once you're a fan, you can also add photos and videos to the page, write on the wall, and connect with other Voxers in ways you may not have previously. Plus, it's a great opportunity to let people know about your Vox blog, or start discussion topics. To become a fan, just visit the official Vox.com Facebook page and click the "Become a Fan" button in the upper right hand corner.
Once you've joined, why not post a response to the current discussion topic? Just post a link (and a brief description, if you'd like) to what you consider one of your all-time best Vox posts.
What are you waiting for? Become a Vox.com fan on Facebook today!
I'm on a posting roll today. Not much to do other than go pick up my paycheck and study for the THEA.
Loathing:
- my inability to stop putting things off until the very last second
- burnt coffee
- stupid contacts
- forgetting to take off my eye makeup before bed
- gas prices...seriously, I declare SHENANIGANS!
Loving:
- Austin, naturally
- my new Whole Foods reusable shopping bags. They're huge, well-made and gorgeous compared to the shit ones you find elsewhere. Only 99 cents, too. I got two, and got an extra twenty cents off. I feel lovely and green.
- The Middleman. I've mentioned this before, but I can't get enough of it. Especially when they bleep out the words.
Looking forward to:
- getting stuff done
- Tish's party this weekend
In honor of the upcoming Olympics, what could you win a gold medal in?
Submitted by TheFiercestCalm.
